That commercial was all over the NBA’s All Star Weekend fun and despite everything going on in the video — KG, The JabbaWockeez, Monty Python homages — the main thing that stands out to me is Usain Bolt’s head, dancing on a pair of feet. And nothing more. No body, no neck. Nothing. Just Bolt’s head and his megawatt smile. Dancing. Connected to feet. It’s both hypnotic and scary at the same time. Don’t get me wrong, Usain deserves all the endorsement money he can finagle because it’s not like Track and Field has NBA-like funds pouring in.
But really, is scaring the hell out of any children watching the dunk contest the best way to promote a new — and unnecessary — branding venture? “What’s ‘G’?” It’s Usain Bolt’s bigger-than-life head dancing across your screen on a golden pair of shoes, evidently.
From the slap-my-face-and-call-me-crazy files, here’s something you probably didn’t think you’d hear about on Friday — or at all. Ever. Marvin Harrison, the quiet guy from the Indianapolis Colts receiving corps, is being investigated for a shooting incident that happened outside of a bar he owns in Philadelphia.
Like you, when I first saw this, I had to check the date to make sure it wasn’t the 1st of April. The Worldwide has more:
The source said the alleged victim came into the bar, Playmakers, around 5 p.m. and engaged in an argument with Harrison, who was at the bar. The victim then left the bar, heading to his car, with Harrison following. Gunfire broke out, the victim was hit in the hand, and a young girl was slightly injured by flying glass from a car that apparently was hit by a bullet.
However, the news gets better because apparently, the bullets from the shooting matched a gun owned by Harrison; a gun that was specially made in Belgium. When asked about the gun at a Philly car washes he owns, Harrison said the gun never left his house.
The specially-made gun was then found in a bucket at said car wash. Upon testing, it was found the gun had fired several shots. And that, my friends, spells trouble for a player many thought embodied the same characteristics shared by Joe Dumars, meaning he was quiet, unassuming guy who did his job very, very well.
Now we get another picture, one that paints Harrison as someone willing to lie about a shooting in order to save himself — and not very well at that (You hid the gun in a bucket at a car wash? Really?).
In light of this news, I’m now waiting for someone to tell me A.C. Green had mad orgies while he was in the NBA, complete with photo proof.