It was the battle of the Incredible Hulk/Superman basketball players last night as Orlando hosted Phoenix, meaning Dwight Howard and the resurgent Shaq went head-to-head. That also means about 590 pounds of combined basketball player beat on each other for about 40 minutes or so, and while O’Neal might be unimpressed with Dwight Howard’s Superman act — saying he did it all first — it didn’t stop Shaq from flopping when Howard shook him out of his shoes with a quick spin move that apparently left the Phoenix man-child quite dizzy. Dizzy enough to flop, something O’Neal himself has expressed his disdain for.
“I was shocked, seriously, shocked,” Magic coach Stan Van Gundy said of O’Neal’s flopping. “And very disappointed cause he knows what it’s like. Let’s stand up and play like men, and I think our guy did that tonight.”
These words come on the heels of Shaq’s statements about Howard, something Howard didn’t really understand. Whatever the case, Howard got the last laugh; first by spinning Shaq into a much-maligned flop and then by beating the Suns, a team fighting for a playoff spot in the Western Conference. Perhaps O’Neal needs to quit worry so much about the fun Howard is having and let the new Superman play his game.
I mean, don’t you have to actually beat someone before you can talk trash? Yes, I know Shaq’s a “been there, done that” player, but history doesn’t mean a whole lot when a player can make you look foolish with a simple spin move.
And yes, I did just rip the title from the children’s book Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. What of it? Considering the night Howard had against the Oklahoma Bland Thunder, the altered title fits. Perfectly. It’ s not everyday someone posts a stat line as gaudy as this:
30 points, 19 rebounds and 10 blocked shots.
It was the first triple-double for Orlando’s man-child and considering his fantasy basketball-tastic output, it was worth the wait. In fact, if you were to ask Stan “Ron Jeremy” Van Gundy about waiting for a Howard triple-dip when the payoff is so impressive, I don’t think he’d have a problem with it.
At 8pm Eastern tonight, the LSU Tigers and THE Ohio State Buckeyes do battle tonight to decide the BCS Championship, whether you agree with the BCS or not. Some are speculating the AP may not agree with awarding tonight’s winner their mythical National Championship designation and could select another team, but much like when the same happened with LSU and USC, it won’t matter.
Whoever wins tonight’s game will be recognized as the BCS Champs and will be entered the record books as such… regardless of what the AP decides. (Sorry, USC fans. You were NOT repeat champions, no matter how much you tell everyone you were. The AP designation DOES NOT MATTER ever since the NCAA sold their soul to the BCS.)
Anyway, instead of concentrating on each team’s multitude of hotties, I thought I’d take a different approach in celebrating tonight’s game. Enjoy:
Wanna-be LSU ladies doing the… wait for it… SOULJA BOY!!!!!!!!11!!1! Because nothing says, “I’ma fan” like trying to act hard and doing one of the most overblown, misunderstood-by-the-masses fads ever. I’m absolutely amazed this song is Grammy nominated… Anyway, enjoy the game.