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Posts Tagged ‘New York Jets’

Dating Tips for Mark Sanchez

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So by now you’ve probably heard the news that Jets Quarterback Mark Sanchez hooked up with a 17-year old. Yay him. It’s not illegal because 17 is the age of consent in New York, but that doesn’t mean it’s normal. Or right. Or cool.

Since Valentine’s Day is right around the corner, I think some dating tips for Mr. Sanchez might be in order.

Card Anyone Who Looks 40 or Younger

Sanchez needs to follow the rules most liquor stores have in place, where the legal age is 21 but they card anyone who looks 30 or younger. Rather than card for anyone who looks 30 and younger, maybe Sanchez should set the limit at 40. Just to be safe.

If a Giggling Teenager Approaches You, It Isn’t Just Because You’re Good Looking

Poor Sanchez has it difficult, because he’s gorgeous and just assumes that chicks wanna get with him because of that. But he needs to understand that he’s in the NFL now, and that alone makes him desirable to girls who wish to yak to the press afterward. Translation? Choose carefully, sluggo. Pictures, video, and other gory details of your special moments will be shared cuz that’s how some chicks roll.

Set a Minimum Age Limit Regardless of What State You’re In

When you’re a young, hot football player and you travel around the country, you’re bound to get confused about the legal age requirement for every single one. After all, you might meet a 17-year old in, say, Wisconsin and before you know it – OOOPS – you’re in jail. Why? Because you forgot that Wisconsin isn’t New York and the legal age limit is actually 18.

Since Sanchez is 24, I recommend an age cutoff of 20. Let’s just keep it simple. Stupid.

Bart Scott’s Parting Shot

After the New York Jets surprising upset of the New England Patriots was complete, Bart Scott offered some final thoughts about a game that had little-to-no build up, a game where both teams were clearly best of friends, with absolutely zero animosity towards each other. After such a contentious build to the game, it’s not surprising Scott didn’t run after Tom Brady and scream the message he had for Sal Paolantonio directly in Brady’s face.

As it stands, Scott’s parting shot wasn’t the end of his post-game yapping, either:

More of Scott’s post-game musings after the jump >>

Wes Welker Cutting Loose: Footloose

When it comes to trash-talking organizations, the two NFL teams who would be considered polar-opposites would be two teams matched up in the NFL Divisional Playoff Game this very weekend: The New York Jets and The New England Patriots.

New York Jets Head Coach, Rex Ryan, is not one to shy away from mugging for the camera.  He’s not at all afraid of offering sports fans a consistently high level of jackassery with some trash talking remark for his opponents (and his detractors).  On trash talking, Rex Ryan says:

“I just build our guys up. If it’s trash talking that I believe in our football team, then, yes, I agree with that statement. I’m the biggest trash talker there is. I don’t disrespect anybody else. I just have confidence in our football team. I don’t mean to be disrespectful at all to opponents.”

Conversely, Bill Belichick is the antithesis of the trash-talking head coach.  The stone-faced crypt-keeper with the wood-chipper style hoodie speaks in one tone – that’s monotone.  Everyone is always on the injury report.  All teams are worthy opponents.  Cut it, print it, ship it – we’re done here.

Hot foot action after the jump >>

Will the Steelers Go All the Way?

Pittsburgh Steelers Hines WardYou bet! Maybe against the Packers, maybe not.

But this weekend, our attention is on the four games involving other potential dancers. And there may be some surprises.

Seattle Will Advance
The regular season is over. Everyone is 0-0. That said, I will ignore the Seahawks losing record during the regular season and give them a win during the postseason tourney, though just one.

The Saints are depleted by injuries and travel to a noisy Northwest. While I have the utmost respect for Drew Brees, I don’t think he can do this alone. It’ll be an early exit for New Orleans (who have never won a road playoff game), and the Seahawks will exit the playoffs next week — unless they play the 49ers, who still may have a shot.

Jets Built for Postseason
The Jets were built for January. And even though they travel, like the Saints – the Colts are missing too many weapons. I do think that Manning can win this game almost single-handed, but he won’t

Even with Joseph Addai back in the lineup, the Colts will be one-and-done. And we’ll be able to hear Rex Ryan sound bytes for at least one more week.

More NFL Playoff predictions after the jump >>

Brett Favre Fined $50,000 for Penisgate

Roger Goodell’s seemingly limitless power to levy fines against football players for transgressions real or imagined continues unabated. It would appear that Goodell is single-handedly bringing the holiday spirit of donating to charity to an unprecedented level – well into the hundreds-of-thousands of dollars. His latest donation of $50,000, made via Brett Favre’s wallet, comes at the conclusion of the much ballyhooed Penisgate.

Brett FavreSecond only in length of time to Brett Favre’s annual on-again off-again retirement drama, the investigation into the alleged sexting incident between Brett Favre and Jenn Sterger has dragged on like a high priced escort working with an ED sufferer. The alleged incident took place more than two years ago while Brett Favre was the quarterback of the New York Jets and Jenn Sterger was a sideline reporter for the team. It appears clear from the outset that Jenn Sterger was a reluctant participant in this salacious Brett Favre scandal story initially brought to light with Deadspin (gratuitous Penisgate photo at the 2:08 mark of the video). There is also little doubt that Brett Favre and his penis were even more embarrassed to have this incident broadcast across the world for all to hear, read, and well, um… see.

Still, Roger Goodell was in the untenable position of not wanting to appear as soft on this alleged violation of the NFL’s personal conduct policy, so he came and came hard by levying the $50,000 fine against the legendary quarterback. While it’s a proverbial drop in the financial bucket for Brett Favre, from my perspective, that’s an awfully steep price to pay for an encounter that didn’t even have a happy ending.

Continue reading about Brett Facre and Penisgate >>

Is This How Favre Saw That Pick Six?

Justa Slingin'

While looking for video of Brett Favre’s game-ending pick six to Dwight Lowery, I came across a fan video of the play, and because it looked like it was filmed by an epileptic after consuming mass amounts of Red Bull, I began to wonder if that’s how Favre sees the field when he throws an interception. First, the video:

Yeah, even though I saw the play last night, I have no idea what’s going on in that video, and it’s probably pretty similar to how Favre saw the Jets’ defense.

Considering the fact “the Gunslinger” has 324 career picks — to his 502 touchdown passes — it’s clear Favre sees the field like that more often than you’d like your quarterback to. And yes, we’re purposely avoiding anything to do with the Jenn Sterger bullshit. While everything she says might be true about Favre, the entire situation feels like manufactured attempt to stay relevant, and considering how many “career changes” she’s had since leaving Florida State sidelines and the approving gaze of Brent Musburger, I wouldn’t be a bit surprised.

That being said, the voicemails sound awfully damning.

What’s next in the never-ending Favre saga? Deanna hitting him in the noggin with a golf club? Or a football helmet? You know, something like this:

Whatever the case, I wish both of them, Jenn and Brett, would just go away. Jenn’s eye-candy ways are played out — not to mention, done better by many, many other co-eds — and well, Favre is just the biggest attention whore walking.

Did Braylon Dougie For the Cops?

Perhaps I’m enjoying the news of Braylon Edwards’ arrest for a DUI — twice the legal limit, apparently — a little too much, but then again, having one occasional good game doesn’t mean you should act a fool with your boys, either. And then try and drive. Actually, act a fool all you want, just don’t get behind the wheel of a car if it involves alcohol.

What, does the Apple not have taxis or personal driver services? I know New York City is a small town with not a lot to offer residents in the way of public transportation (wink), but surely Edwards could’ve found somebody willing to drive his Dougie-ing ass around.

Oddly enough, Edwards wasn’t yanked for suspicion of driving under the influence. No, he was pulled over for the tint on his windows being darker than the legal limit. Yes, rules are rules, but surely, NYC cops have more to do than watch for overly-tinted vehicles. Of course, had Edwards not been drinking, the too-dark window tint stop wouldn’t have been news. Too bad for him he didn’t plan ahead or, worse yet, simply didn’t care that he was too drunk to drive.

As for the Jets, they released a statement concerning Edwards’ brilliance legal woes (self-inflicted):

“We are very disappointed in Braylon’s actions this morning. The Player Protect program is in place for our organization to prevent this situation. Braylon is aware of this program and showed poor judgment.

“We are reviewing the information with the league and will impose the appropriate disciplinary measures.”

For the life of me, I can’t help but wonder if Braylon got out of his car and started doing the Dougie for the arresting officers. That’s about the only thing this story’s lacking.

Ines Sainz Hubub Recalls Dave Chappelle

Ines Sainz

Surprisingly, the Ines Sainz stuff is getting much more coverage than expected, and a lot has been said on both sides of the fence. Some of it is compelling reading, some of it silly. One thing that has been a constant, at least for me, is every time I hear about Sainz and her New York Jets locker room adventure, I’m reminded of Dave Chappelle’s HBO special, Killing Them Softly, specifically, the part where Dave ponders the psychology of women and men in these kinds of situations.


“Just because I’m dressed this way does not make me a whore.”

True, but don’t be surprised if a bunch of testosterone-addled professional athletes — the same ones who have been told all summer how great they are — respond like they are at a strip club. Is that kind of behavior right or should it be condoned? You’d hope people are mature enough to enjoy the physical beauty of someone without acting like they were in a meat market, but then again, dressing in a manner that heavily accentuates the female breast and ass in front of a group of aggressive males … you can finish this sentence however you see fit.

Clearly, the topic is still open to discussion.