The Hello Bar is a simple web toolbar that engages users and communicates a call to action.
  1. Skip to navigation
  2. Skip to content
  3. Skip to sidebar

Posts Tagged ‘Mark Sanchez’

Dating Tips for Mark Sanchez

If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed or follow us on Facebook. Thanks for visiting!

So by now you’ve probably heard the news that Jets Quarterback Mark Sanchez hooked up with a 17-year old. Yay him. It’s not illegal because 17 is the age of consent in New York, but that doesn’t mean it’s normal. Or right. Or cool.

Since Valentine’s Day is right around the corner, I think some dating tips for Mr. Sanchez might be in order.

Card Anyone Who Looks 40 or Younger

Sanchez needs to follow the rules most liquor stores have in place, where the legal age is 21 but they card anyone who looks 30 or younger. Rather than card for anyone who looks 30 and younger, maybe Sanchez should set the limit at 40. Just to be safe.

If a Giggling Teenager Approaches You, It Isn’t Just Because You’re Good Looking

Poor Sanchez has it difficult, because he’s gorgeous and just assumes that chicks wanna get with him because of that. But he needs to understand that he’s in the NFL now, and that alone makes him desirable to girls who wish to yak to the press afterward. Translation? Choose carefully, sluggo. Pictures, video, and other gory details of your special moments will be shared cuz that’s how some chicks roll.

Set a Minimum Age Limit Regardless of What State You’re In

When you’re a young, hot football player and you travel around the country, you’re bound to get confused about the legal age requirement for every single one. After all, you might meet a 17-year old in, say, Wisconsin and before you know it – OOOPS – you’re in jail. Why? Because you forgot that Wisconsin isn’t New York and the legal age limit is actually 18.

Since Sanchez is 24, I recommend an age cutoff of 20. Let’s just keep it simple. Stupid.

Shonn Greene’s Beastly Touchdown

With 263 rushing yards in the Jets’ two playoff games, rookie Shonn Greene has the second-best rushing total ever by a rookie in the NFL Playoffs. Not only is Greene producing at a high rate, it’s his play, and not the other, more well-known rookie — Mark Sanchez — that’s leading the Jets to an unexpected appearance in the AFC Championship game. Granted, Sanchez hasn’t made any costly mistakes, however, without Greene and Thomas Jones keeping opposing defenses honest, opponents would simply tee off on the rookie quarterback, forcing him to either win or loss the game.

However, because the Jets running game is going so well — not to mention, their stout defense — Sanchez can get away with a pedestrian 12-23 for one TD and one interception performance and still be a position to make a Super Bowl appearance.

In the lead video, we have Greene’s touchdown that broke the proverbial backs of the San Diego Chargers, and all I can say about that is, “poor Eric Weddle.” In case you missed it, Weddle is the Charger who got absolutely “hit stick trucked” by Greene as he rumbled for the go-ahead score. Next up for the surprising Jets? A Sunday date with the Indianapolis Colts. The winner, of course, gets a to punch their ticket for Miami, Florida, and a February 7th date with whoever the NFC decides to send.

As of now, it’s hard not to like Minnesota’s chances, but then again, let’s see how they fair on the road against New Orleans before anyone crowns them “NFC Champions.”

Hot Dog Gate Turns Positive (Mark Sanchez)

After being crucified for eating a hot dog on the sideline during the Oakland Raiders beatdown, Mark Sanchez is turning lemons — or in this case, hot dogs — into good fortune for others. Sanchez was hammered pretty hard for his late-game snack, but that hasn’t stopped him from doing something good with all the publicity: Donating a thousand hot dogs and hamburgers to a soup kitchen in his area. Hopefully, this will put an end to incessant chirping about Sanchez’ eating habits during football games.

Was seeing Sanchez eat the hot dog eyebrow-raising? Sure, but I don’t think it warranted the quasi media storm that followed. Nevertheless, something good did come out of it, so there is that. If there is a deity out there, Sanchez’ generosity will bring “hot dog gate” to a close.

Braylon Edwards Goes to the Big Apple

Braylon Edwards is now a New York Jet, which means, the lesson here is if you want to get traded out of Cleveland, punch someone in LeBron James’ entourage. While Edwards does bring the potential of his 2007 season (1289 yards, 16 touchdowns) to the harem of Mark Sanchez, he also brings the side that will go the entire game without a catch against the Cincinnati Bengals.

A word of advice for the newest Jet — Braylon, you might want to update your website. It still has you in a Cleveland Browns uniform.

As for the trade itself, Derek Anderson is happy Edwards is no longer his teammate. Considering Edwards’ performance against the Bengals, also Anderson’s first start of the year for Cleveland, can you blame him?

Mark Sanchez Named Starter

Mark Sanchez

A couple of days after being hit in the mouth by Ray Lewis and the Baltimore Ravens defense, Mark Sanchez has been rewarded for surviving his baptism-by-fire by being named the regular season starting quarterback for the New York Jets, beating out Kellen Clemens. As per usual with all NFL news, it was Jay Glazer who broke the story about Sanchez. Apparently, the Jets coaching staff was impressed with the way he hung in after his rough start against the Ravens. After getting smacked in the mouth by Lewis, causing him to throw a pick-six interception during a check down, Sanchez maintained a level of poise long enough to lead his team on an end-of-the-first-half touchdown drive.

Granted, the Ravens had begun using second team defenders by then, but Sanchez should still be given credit for not wilting after being absolutely bum rushed early in the game. No word on whether the Jets have actually acquired a receiver — besides Jerricho Cotchery — for Sanchez to throw the ball to.

Considering the attention to defense the Jets paid this offseason, I’m expecting a number of 16-13 games, coupled with a middle of the road, 8-8/7-9 record.

Welcome to the NFL, Mark Sanchez

It’s funny how one play can change perceptions. It can turn optimistic prognostications into ones filled with fear and loathing. One play can, quite simply, turn fantasy into reality. Such is the case when a rookie quarterback with suspect offensive talent around him faces the brutal gang known as the Baltimore Ravens defense. A mere two downs into their first possession of the evening, New York Jets rookies quarterback Sanchez was introduced to Ray Lewis in the way Lewis introduces himself to most opposing rookies: By knocking the piss out of them.

More after the jump >>

Is Anyone Going To Sign (NFL Rookies)

Matt Stafford

Yes, I know Matt Stafford has signed with the Detroit Lions, nevertheless, he represents the NFL Draft’s first round — at least for this post, he does. The issue at hand is with NFL training camps starting this week, out of the 32 first round draft picks, only four have signed their contract — Stafford, Mark Sanchez, Cleveland Browns center Alex Mack, and Evander “Ziggy” Hood by the Pittsburgh Steelers. It should be noted Hood was the final pick of the first round.

Continue reading after the jump >>

Top QB Picks Make the Rounds

Matt Stafford and Mark Sanchez are the talk of the town right now, something being a top draft pick affords. Last night, both franchise saviors were in the Big Apple, as the media mecca continued with their star-building mode — build them up to tear them down, and all that. Stafford, who apparently has a room at Radio City Music Hall, was on David Letterman last night to assist with the Top-10, concerning the thoughts going through Stafford’s head during the draft — “If I win one game, I’m a hero.” and “Why is Jessica Simpson calling me?” were faves.

Not to be outdone, New York’s newest golden boy, Mark Sanchez, was out at Citi Field, throwing out the first pitch for the Mets/Marlins game. The reception for Sanchez was as warm as you would expect, something that’s been going on since his name was announced on Saturday — although, he air-mailed the pitch.

Mark Sanchez

In other news, I’ve noticed the Sanchez pick is being routinely praised, while the Stafford choice seems to have a lot more doubt attached to it. If I’m not mistaken, doesn’t Stafford have more offensive weapons to work with than Sanchez? Yes, the Jets should have a great defense, but they don’t have Calvin Johnson or the overlooked Kevin Smith, who had a much better season, production-wise, than most remember.

Granted, that by no means is meant to discount Thomas Jones or Jerricho Cotchery — Sanchez’ set of proven tools — but neither player has the youth Johnson and Smith bring.

Just sayin’.