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Vasectomy Kit

Let’s face it, people will do just about anything to go to and/or enjoy the Super Bowl. Whether it’s offering themselves as date (Sarah Spain), or as human toilets; you name it, people have probably been willing to do it for tickets to the NFL’s championship game. In fact, being the troopers that they are, Cracked.com put together a list of the most pathetic attempts to get Super Bowl tickets, but thanks the awesomeness of Craiglist, it looks like we have another one for Cracked to consider.

This latest attempt finds a desperate man trying his hardest to follow his New Orleans Saints. So much, in fact, he’s offering something rather personal in return: His left nut. Observe:

High capacity, O negative, well traveled, well maintained, larger than average, only used for @ 22 years! (was in storage before that)
1 available!
History of producing blond haired Caucasian males inclined towards joining the military. (1 army, 1 marine) (results may vary!)
All sales are final!!
Will complete transaction after the game! (and I’ll need a ride to the airport and help on a plane!)
Pictures/documentation available upon request.
No perverts!!!!!

To me, the “No perverts” is simply a touch of class that brings the entire thing together, much like a nice bass line. So, if you have Super Bowl tickets to spare and are perhaps needing to upgrade your reproductive organs, there’s someone out there with you in mind.